Written by: Jadine
Raising your children from birth to age four is a time where you are fully vested in their upbringing; celebrating successes and supporting struggles. A significant transition takes place when your four year-old enters kindergarten and you are no longer involved in all of the ups and downs, socially and academically in your school-aged child’s life. This disconnect can be challenging and a time where parents need to be the voice for their child when their kids arrive home with stories of struggles and frustrations of their own or marked school work and report cards that are demonstrating gaps in their learning.
Here are some suggestions to help you prepare to handle these types of situations:
Be In the Know
Prior to contacting your child’s school, it is beneficial to have as much knowledge of the happenings at school as you can.
Socially: Network with the parents of the children that your child associates with. (admittedly, as a busy working mom, I too need to take my own advice on this one.) Developing a rapport and open communication with the parents of the other children can help you to put out social fires before they need to escalate to contacting the school to help resolve any problems. Remember that your child’s account of the day’s event is only one side to the story. If you are able to get the pieces of the rest of the story from the other parents, this may help you both support your children.
Academically: Many teachers utilize digital platforms for information sharing with parents about what the students are learning about in class such as SeeSaw, Google Classroom, Remind, etc. If you receive a notice from the teacher on how to connect to the app that they are using, take advantage of this tool as a way to be a “fly on the wall” and get a glimpse of what your child is doing and learning in class. This can help you support your child at home with after school discussions beyond the typical “How was school today?,” response: “Good.”
If you ever wonder what your child will be learning about at school for all areas including, Language, Mathematics, Science, Social Studies, Physical Education and Health, etc. all Ontario Curriculum documents are accessible to the public and are organized by subject matter available at: http://www.edu.gov.on.ca/eng/curriculum/elementary/subjects.html
Encourage and Support Self-Advocacy
We all want to raise self-sufficient members of society. To do so, it is important to not always take on every battle for your child(ren) as your own. Encouraging and supporting your child to use their own voice to advocate for themselves to peers (to encourage peer conflict resolution) and school staff (to relay their need for support or clarification), will greatly enhance their ability to handle situations as they grow up.
Talk with your child about strategies to deal with issues that may arise;
Socially: have they shared their feelings about what happened with their friend? If they aren’t yet comfortable talking directly with a friend, you can support them in writing a letter/email/text message to a friend that will begin the conversation.
Academically: have they shared with their teacher their concerns? If they have tried this without desired outcomes or if they aren’t comfortable addressing the teacher themselves, you can email the teacher to arrange a face-to-face meeting with your child present and be a support person by encouraging the child (at any age) to lead the meeting and share their own thoughts.
Advocating for Your Child
Now that you have the background knowledge of social happenings and academic learning in the classroom and you have encouraged your child to be a self-advocate, you might find that you may still need to step up to the plate to advocate for your child’s well-being and needs at school.
There is a hierarchy within the school system regarding addressing concerns:
1. Email the teacher (this is a way to have a paper trail of your correspondence)
2. Meet or phone call with the teacher
3. Email the principal
4. Meet or phone call with the principal or vice-principal
5. Email the Superintendent
6. Meet or phone call with the Superintendent
Teachers are your partner in education and are most often open to receiving feedback and information regarding your child to support their learning and help maximize their success before issues need to escalate to administration.
Bonus: As busy parents, you may find it difficult to be involved with your child(ren)’s school such as volunteering in the classroom or attending field trips. Another way you can be involved by having first-hand information on school happenings and having a say is by joining the School Council which usually meets monthly. Reach out to your child’s school to inquire about their School Council and how you can get involved.
Remember, you are the case manager when it comes to your child’s needs and their education. Ask questions, advocate, and embrace each stage of their educational journey.
Written by: Jadine
Jadine is an Educator and Mother. Learn more about Jadine Here.
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