The Holiday Season is upon us, and for many of us, myself included, that can mean taking on more plans in our schedules, more spending, and more stress. Of course the Holidays can come with great excitement and fun as well – especially for kids! But for many caregivers it can be hard to find the time to slow down and enjoy the fun between the stress.
When we get busy and stressed, usually the first things to go are our patience and our routines. Tantrums seem more overwhelming to manage, children’s anxiety can seem inconvenient when you just need to get to the Christmas party on time, and ADHD symptoms can feel unmanageable with 20 family members visiting for dinner. Feeling exhausted from the day can make sticking to bedtime routines seem impossible – especially with more late nights during the Holiday Season.
So, in honour of the business that usually comes this time of year – here are some extra tips for when life gets busy:
Learn to say ‘No’:
If you are like me, then you probably want to say yes to every invite that comes your way. Either out of a feeling of obligation, or genuine excitement for the event, saying no can feel like it isn’t an option this time of year. But in reality – we can’t do it all. We can’t attend every gathering and buy everyone we know that perfect gift. We can’t do every holiday activity – it just isn’t possible – and trying to ‘do it all’ can leave us feeling burnt out and overwhelmed.
Saying no can help ease our stress, free up time in our schedules, and best of all – when we say no to what we don’t want to do or can’t manage, we actually gain more time for the things that really matter. What really matters to you during the holidays? What are you simply doing out of habit or guilt that you can let go of to leave more time for what really matters?
Stick to Routines:
Sticking to routines is a great way to stay balanced during busy times – and it is so important for kids. Consistent routines help kids feel secure and can make mornings, evenings, and transitions less stressful. Consistent routines are important for all kids, and especially for kids with anxiety, ADHD, and who have recently experienced a big change (like moving) or a tough loss.
When we get busy we need our routines more than ever, however this is usually when they fall to the side (unless I am alone in this??). We may not be able to follow every routine completely everyday. Try thinking about the most basic aspects of your routine that you feel are important to keep up with everyday. Does the bedtime story help your child become calm before sleep? Do you need to make sure you have time for a shower and your first coffee before the kids get up? Try writing down the aspects of your daily routine that are most important – and then post them somewhere in your home as a reminder for what needs to happen everyday for everyone to stay balanced and get through the business. Then stick to those things as much as you can and practice self-compassion when you can’t.
Find Time for Self-Care:
This holiday season I encourage you to do at least one thing that is completely for you and that helps you feel relaxed. It may feel impossible to find the time, but when we care for ourselves, we are better able to manage stress and care for others. It is SO important. And remember that if you are stressed, your kids are likely stressed as well. If you are rushing, they are rushing (or feel like they are even if they are moving at a snail’s pace!) And when kids are stressed, more behaviours come out. Anxiety is heightened, tantrums are bigger, kids are more hyper and easily distracted. By taking care of yourself you are literally taking care of those around you. And besides, you deserve it!
Enjoy:
When things get busy it can be so hard to stop and simply enjoy what we are doing. Even though those holiday gatherings can bring stress, they probably also bring joy. So this year, in between tasks, try to take some time to pause and notice when you are enjoying your time. Then make even more time for those things next year š
Until next time,
Meg
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